When I learned that I was having my first boy, I was really shocked. I had no idea what having a boy would be like! I never imagined myself with a son, much less 3 sons now! I really had no earthly idea what I was going to do with them!
I truly knew how to handle and connect with my daughter. That was easy. But a boy? Eeek!
Thankfully I’ve gotten a little more comfortable through the years with the concept of boys, and now I can’t imagine my life without them!
Boys are so much fun, and really, so much less emotional drama than girls.
I’ll admit though, having boys didn’t come as naturally to me as having girls.
I wanted to share some great and fun ways that I’ve learned to connect with my sons through the years, and form strong mommy- son bonds!
20 Powerful ways to Connect with Your Son
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1. Listen to him
This means actively listening to what he has to say, and not interrupting or cutting him off. I will fully admit that this can be hard sometimes. Stories sometimes tend to go on and on.
For me, this looks like me stopping what I am doing, setting aside whatever task I am working on, and looking at him while he talks. Otherwise, I tend to be only half listening and he can tell.
2. Sit and do nothing with him
This goes along with the listening. The goal is to stop what you are doing for a few minutes at least, and just hang with him.
This can be done before bed, or over the breakfast table, whatever and whenever is convenient for you both. Just take some time out and let the conversation flow where ever it naturally goes. If you son is like mine, he will tell you all about his roblox world, or what he is building on Minecraft! While I have been known to roll my eyes at yet another gaming conversation, I’ve realized that if this is what’s important to him, then I need to be paying attention!
Sometimes, he may not want to talk. That’s OK too! The point is, don’t have an agenda all the time.
3. Snuggle with him
I’ve learned that often my sons will pretend to be grossed out by hugging and physical touch. But at the end of the day, they love to snuggle, and let me rub their backs as we pray and get ready for bed.
Snuggle up on the couch and read a book together or just give him a quick hug as he’s passing through.
4. Spend Time doing what he wants to do
This could be anything that he is into right now. Make an effort to learn about what he is into and that will go a long way in his book.
Here are some more powerful, and specific ideas to help you connect with your son…
5. Plan a small date with only him
6. Bond over making dinner together
7. Play a game with him
8. Wrestle with him
9. Explore the outdoors with him
10. Take him to an amusement park
11. Plan a picnic with him
12. Read a book with him
13. Day dream with him about his perfect day
14. Have hot chocolate with him
15. Take him on a trip
16. Do a YouTube challenge with him
17. Play a video game with him
18. Plan a prank on another family member with him
19. Learn with him about something that he enjoys
20. Watch a movie with him
The best moms are not perfect, and they do not have perfect juggling skills. The best moms understand that connection, and regular re-connection takes intentional work. It’s nice when it comes easy, but don’t be discouraged if it does not. After all, the best things in life come to those who work for it!
Below are a few fantastic reads for boys and their moms!
Click on each photo to see more.
Nicely put down. I don’t have a son but would do these similar quality things with my daughter too.
Thanks Supriya! You can definitely apply these tips to girls as well!
Wonderful article, I don’t have any boys just girls but, I feel like a lot of these tips can be applied to them as well. I also feel like you’re suggestion that cooking with them is probably the best thing on this list. I think it’ll help him later on develop a more loving relationship with his partner. Cooking really is a great tool for bonding
Latasha, you are so right, you can definitely use all of these tips with your girls as well, and teaching them to cook is a great one! Thanks!
My son is now 20 and I still plan small dates with him. He has 3 younger sisters, but I believe it is important to do this with each of them. I love it! It’s a small thing to do that lets each of the kids know how special they are to me and provides some great bonding time and conversation while doing so. 🙂
I love that you still do dates with your 20 year old son, you are my hero and all that I want to be someday!
Love this! I am a single mom to a son and daughter and it is so important to connect with both of them.
I love this! As a mama to three boys, I have to remember to give each one their special quality time. They’re all so different so at times it can be a lot but I love seeing the joy in their eyes. My boys love building Legos with me, reading, crafts and tons of snuggles!
Love this! I also have 3 boys.
Amazing tips. Its so important to listen to what they are interested in, even if you’re not interested at all..like video games! But i am finding the more i say yes and uhuh to his mario stories, the less he wants to tell me..i have to engage and ask questions and repeat what he said back to him so he knows im listening. So terrible of me to try to tune out his talking sometimes, makes me feel guilty.
It is sooo important to make a sincere effort to be interested in what they are into…it’s hard sometimes though!
My sons and I loooove going out to lunch and going shopping. They say the funniest things in public!
Thats great that you have that one thing that you love to do with your sons!
These are wonderful bonding ideas for mommies and sons! I will definitely keep all this in mind as my son grows older. Being mindful and listening, i think, are so important!!!
I loved reading this! I’m a new boy mom, and can’t wait to start the mother son bonding!
Thank you for this list. My son is 18 months old and we do Saturday dates to Panera! When he grows older, I will definitely take the time to listen to what he has to say and do what he wants to do!
Great tips! Will def hold onto this one for when my boys are older.
This is so sweet!!
Thanks Ashley!
As a boy mama myself to two, this was so close to home. Mine definitely love snuggles too!